Yes, folk, it’s true… it has been reported that the low-crime area of Betty’s has been hit by a new kind of criminal: bread thieves. Local residents are aware that the thieves are living in the bush near the reserve area but refuse to take the matter further. ‘Times are tough, especially with the drought,’ said Whipping It Up whose freshly baked bread was recently stolen while it was cooling outside.
Whipping It Up filed the folllowing report:
I had just baked a 500g white flour loaf and placed it on a cooling rack outside on the patio next to the kitchen door. I left the door open as it was a hot day and was about to pour a glass of chilled white wine when I noticed something very odd. THE BREAD WAS MOVING!
I dashed closer to the door and there, lo and behold, were two little mongooses trying to get the bread down the stairs. One of the mongooses had burnt its tongue and was panting (I wish I could describe how cute a mongoose’s tongue is!). Eventually, after trying various techniques, they figured out that they could move the bread in little bursts by only using the tips of their teeth.
Unfortunately I moved too close to the scene of the crime and they ran off into the surrounding bush.
I picked up the evidence and wondered how many people get to eat bread that has little mongoose footprints all over it (there were no bite marks). I put the oven on high and nuked whatever germs there may have been and then shared my lunch of bread and cheese with them shortly thereafter (although they ate the spoils whilst still in hiding).